Boring Weekends & Reasons to Thank Your Parents

 I turned 24 a little over a month ago, it wasn't a momentous occasion, it was a good day. That was exactly what I wanted for my birthday, just a good, simple day. I've learned as I've aged that the most simple, relaxing days are some of the best. Today has been a good example for me. I woke up just before my 11am alarm. I always forget to turn off my work alarms on the weekend, but I've been awake before them both this weekend. Certainly not a bad thing, keeping a routine provides stability and normalcy. I am beginning to crave those things as I age. But back to my simple, relaxing weekend. (Yes I have a point, and yes you have to read the whole post to find out what it is). 

Around 11:30 or midnight on Friday night, I was nailing down a drink recipe that is for Code Red. I love being able to combine my bartending knowledge with my books. It was a delicious drink, and I was about half way through the first one when my phone dinged with a text. It was my grandfather asking me to lunch, because my little sister was missing me. We planned lunch, and I finished my drink, deciding against anymore since I wouldn't be able to sleep in. This was no sacrifice by any means, any time I get to spend with my family is greatly enjoyed. Tyler and I watched Scary Movie 2 (don't judge me, but I had never seen any of them, I don't watch horror movies, even the comedy ones), and I went to bed. I woke up far earlier than I intended the next morning, which was good, because the kid was already ready for lunch. It gave me enough time to shower, pick up my living room, and be slipping on my shoes when she knocked on my apartment door. We had a good lunch and spent a little time hanging out. We took my dog, Juniper, for a walk, and they headed home. The only productive thing I did for the rest of my Saturday was clean my bathroom. Today, I woke up about 11, came into my living room, grabbed the crocheting project I've been working on since I finished my first blanket, turned on Rizzoli and Isles, and sat back in the recliner. Where I stayed crocheting and binging the show until about 5 o'clock. My shoulders hurts a bit from the consistent use of the muscles for such a prolonged period of time, sometimes I feel closer to 50 than 30. I got up and did my dishes, my second important task for the weekend. And now here I sit, writing this blog post. Seems awfully boring right? 

It's a great thing, it's given me lots of time to relax, and process thoughts, feelings, and make plans for my next few weeks. I've spent a lot of time thinking about the parents in my life. I am always needing an adultier adult. I have just enough doubt in my own thoughts to consult others when I have things on my mind. Especially hard decisions. I have plenty of ability to use discernment, but sometimes the best way for me to ensure I'm acting without reacting is to call my Dad. A recent conversation we had, has left me having to preemptively make a choice, that while basically small, has left me slightly frazzled. The particular thing while it's weighing very heavily on my mind has no true consequence in my day to day life. For the most part, it is a thought to file away for later. But I'm not very good at that part. I've found myself dissecting everything surrounding this. Now I'm not one for mental masturbation (or at least I try like hell not to be). Probably why I'm writing this blog post. Now, what was the point? 

As we get older we begin to appreciate our parents more, at least those of us that have at least one good parent. I'm very thankful for the adults in my life that are still helping guide my choices even this far into my adult life. I'm sure they wouldn't agree with every single one of them, but at the very least someone is in my ear ensuring I'm making the one's I can live with. I'm grateful for that. Take the time to be grateful for the parents in your life, we'd certainly be lost without them. 

I'm going back to my boring, but very relaxing weekend. 

Taila Out. 

Screaming, Crying, Throwing Up, No Just Editing.

 I finished the original edits of Code Red on September 4th, almost exactly five years after I finished the first draft. My first Alpha reader read it and gave me notes that day (a true rockstar). My second Alpha reader is currently on a second read through. The other people I've sent it to are in various stages or haven't gotten back to me. That's okay. I finished going through Chapter 20 of 32 (Technically 31 plus the epilogue). It's been a bit slow going, I was hoping I'd have the final edits mapped out by now, but alas here I am, still trying to figure it out. I know now that I'll be adding a prologue, and very likely another 10,000+ words to the story. That is as exciting as it is daunting. The process of editing is something I should probably research more. Not because I haven't in the past, but I probably need a refresher. I've considered putting each chapter in the Hemingway app to see how it does. Maybe after I've gotten through my final edits. 

I think this is technically my 3rd round of edits. Snapchat memories is useful when trying to remember details from 2017. Initially, I went through the story and made what I can only call "basic" edits. I then printed a copy, that with the help of a friend at the time, was heavily annotated with edits to make on the digital copy. I have to admit I despise typing up something I have physically written, but it's much easier for me to make edits and notice mistakes in a printed copy. It ended up taking me five years to get all of the edits made digitally. I'd like it not to take another 5 this time around. But I am doing these final edits on a printed copy, I've changed my methods some, to make it easier and more organized. Sticky notes are my best friend now. 

I'm attached to the book as it is now. Some part of me doesn't want to make massive changes. It is the story I wanted to tell. I'm not a heavily descriptive author, or at least I wasn't when I began writing the book over five years ago. I think that's changed quite a bit in my more recent work. But the number one compliant so far is there isn't enough description. Especially in the first four chapters. I'm convinced I lost some of my edits, because I have some vivid memories of changes I made that aren't in this copy. Thus is the issue with technology, and taking so long to edit. Attachment has to be the biggest struggle I'm having, to edit, I must let go of the original to create a better version. I want to do that, the perfectionist in me requires it. There has to be some balance, between listening to the critiques, and maintaining my image of the story as a whole. There's two more books to write, I know overall how the story will go, ensuring the first book has all that it needs to tell the rest of the story is paramount. My goal currently is the be done with edits before November 5th. I'll have a ways to go in typing, writing, and rewriting. I want to have it done by the end of the year. 

I shall return to ripping my hair out over these edits now. Wish me luck. 

Taila Out. 

Ribbit and Rip It

 

If you've seen She Hulk on Disney+ enjoy the reference in the title. She Hulk is the inspiration for this blog post. I highly recommend going to enjoy it, it's funny, it's a well put together show (I'm going to watch the finale right after I write this post, but I'm standing by my enjoyment). So you might be asking how does this pertain to a blog post? Well, I'm going to talk about being contrary. If you spend much time on the internet, you've probably seen a lot of hate about well... everything honestly. Nothing is sacred. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm all for critiquing things. I could spend hours debating books, movies, politics, religion, just about anything. Part of the fun of consuming is to critique. I just feel like the culture of the internet today (maybe just society in general) has taken things a step too far. 

We can use Star Wars as a good example of this. People hate the prequels, passionately, when the new movies came out I was perpetually on the internet (a lil Tumblr girlie... the good old days). I liked them, I think the Force Awakens was fairly well received (at least in the circles I was in), but when the Last Jedi came out... Oh man. The fandom tore itself apart. Now, it was a weak Star Wars movie, definitely had some huge issues. But did I enjoy it? Yes. Did I enjoy Rise of Skywalker? Yes. I won't even mention how much (in my opinion unnecessary) hate Solo received. It isn't enjoyable to be a Star Wars fan, the debates are repetitive, and you're not really allowed to have a differing opinion. I left fandoms almost entirely many years ago. I'd much rather discuss these things with my friends and family, than random strangers on the internet who are going to call me a bitch because I like Kylo Ren. 

That was a very long winded explanation to begin getting to my point, but hopefully y'all will understand. Now, I am not by any means the person who goes with the flow of society. I don't keep up with trends, I don't try to be cool. That hasn't always been true. I spent most of my young life just wanting to fit in. Most of us do. Now? I literally couldn't care any less. I enjoy what I enjoy, a lot of that is mainstream, some isn't. Both is good *insert the gif here*. But I was a very contrary teenager. (aren't those words synonymous?)  Anything other people loved I had to hate on. Everything was self focused and about how things made me feel. Which is basically the attitude of the entire internet today. I dislike it. We can feel things and not make them other people's problem. I don't have to be argumentative just because someone likes something I don't. It's actually a much more peaceful way to live, to allow people their opinions. Every one has them, and like assholes, they're usually full of shit. So I'm gonna go watch She Hulk twerk with Megan The Stallion, and randomly holler out "Ribbit and Rip It" at totally inappropriate times. I kind of hope it makes some virgin on the internet mad. Being alive is great, we don't have to miserable. As much as the internet would like us to be today. 

I'll be discussing this topic, and going more in depth on cancel culture on my podcast! More details on that coming soon!

Peace Out